Were you disappointed today?
How did you deal with the situation?
Were you able to handle it rationally or did you throw a hissy fit?
I was disappointed with a person’s behaviour this morning.
A random person who threw a tantrum on the road!
This morning, on our way to the school we saw an incident which made me write this piece.
After dropping off my son, I was making my way to my daughters’ school. We reached a turn on the road where we had to go left.
There were two cyclists, a woman and a man, in front of us, so we were slowing down to let them pass. As they reached the turn, the guy lost his balance and rode into the back of the woman’s cycle and fell on the road.
He was very lucky and obviously very shaken . As soon as he got up he started shaking his head at the woman, as if saying that it was her fault. He picked up his bike and went to the side, and the woman followed. I had put the hazard lights on by then, just to let others know that there was a problem on the road. The guy then said something to the woman, looked at us and gestured that we should go. He waved at us and we started moving slowly. He looked angry and kept shaking his head and gesturing at the woman. The woman was quiet. (I hope he got over his tantrum quickly).
This was a person who obviously didn’t know how to cope with problems. As soon as he was faced with one, he put the blame on the person next to him.
I thought this was a great opportunity to talk to my daughter about the importance of being resilient and learning to deal with any situation calmly.
I painted a picture of another scenario for my daughter to think about. I said that he could have picked up his bike and could have just waved at us and then talked to his partner, saying something like how lucky he was to be safe, and that would have set a very different tone for their day. And that would have definitely left a very different impression on us too. That would have suggested to us that this man was capable of dealing with problems/life situations in a rational manner, without getting flustered. I understand it was a very scary experience for him but he was able to get up and walk straightaway. He was fine and safe, which is what mattered the most. I also understand that everyone deals with situations differently, but things can be handled with a lot less drama, don’t you think?
Life is not perfect. Life cannot be perfect all the time. There are ups and downs that we have to go through. But we can make it a better place by dealing with our problems in a calm and reasonable way. A lot of times we make a situation worse by the way we react to it.
If someone throws a tantrum every time things don’t work out according to plan, then they definitely need to go back to Pre-school or a ‘life-school’ and learn how to control their emotions and behave rationally. It is never too late to learn these skills but if we instill these values and skills in our children from day one, then they will be in a better place to deal with any kind of situation.
As parents we need to make sure that we teach our children how to deal with failure and disappointments. They need to face situations where things don’t work out according to plan, even if at times you have to create such a situation on purpose, like cancelling a trip they are really looking forward to or a play date that they want to have, or any other way you think you could do it. These disappointments, even though small, will hopefully give them the skills to deal with real life situations in a better way. They won’t throw a tantrum every time something goes wrong.
Let’s equip our children to look at the positive side of things. It is ok to be upset but it is important to teach them how to deal with problems and not to fall in a heap every time things go wrong.
Let’s be their role models and set the tone for life. Let’s show them how we deal with our problems and teach them to be strong and resilient.
Let’s help them be more settled human beings, who know how to cope with difficulties in life, who do not look for someone else to put their blame on, who are ready to deal with any situation life throws at them. Let’s teach them to use failures and disappointments as stepping stones to become stronger individuals.
Let’s use this incident as a reminder to help our children grow into confident, respectful and resilient individuals. I think this is the least we can do for them and our society.
What are your thoughts?
I would love to hear from you. Leave a comment and share your feelings.
Have a good day.
Shelly Singh ?
Feng Shui and Paht Chee Consultant
Canberra, Australia
Email: shellysingh168@gmail.com
Ph: +61 448 468 968
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