When it comes to decluttering your life, it can be hard to know where to start.
Not just what to pick up and move first, but which process or system to follow!
Before we even get started on the ‘real’ stuff we can easily get lost in all the conflicting but well-meaning advice from; celebrities, celebrity organisers, minimalists, friends and family.
It’s counterintuitive. The goal of decluttering is to simplify and to reduce the burden on ourselves and our families. At least, that’s the goal for me!
So today my advice is this – stop looking for more advice.
Stop looking for more clever storage solutions.
Stop looking for that perfect easy thing that will make all your clutter-free dreams come true. You already have it. It’s you.
Instead, look for support. Look to yourself for your goals, talk to the people around you and ask for support.
Here’s the kicker – often the people closest to you are NOT the best support for decluttering.
As much as they love you and care about you, they will always see you in their way. They want to protect you and so might lead you away from your goals because the road is a rough one. Deep down, they might not want you to be successful because they are not ready for things to change. They could feel that your goals are a criticism of their life choices! Or perhaps you are not comfortable accepting their support because you feel judged or like they’re being critical of you.
The good news is that you get to decide who to have on your team. You will know it’s the right choice because, whatever the reason, with the wrong support you will feel frustrated and unaccomplished. With the right support, you will feel inspired and motivated.
The support you need might be someone you live with, a friend or family member, or as my clients have chosen – a professional. They don’t even need to be there physically unless you need help moving things, video calls can cross oceans and still be filled with inspiration and motivation.
By setting yourself up with the right support and knowledge that there is no one perfect way of doing things – only the one that works for you right now – you will be setting yourself up for long-term changes. And that’s what we need, lasting results.
“Well, that’s great! But what do I do RIGHT NOW when this whole house is driving me nuts!!?!?!”
I hear you. Setting up and making mindset changes takes time. So, while you’re thinking about it I’ll give you the same advice I’ve just given a friend.
She’s had a quick and painful change in circumstances and is struggling to see her new life under the chaos that the old one has left behind. She is ready to get her home under control but her two small children are getting underfoot, and she says she needs a full day without them to get anywhere with the house.
Here’s what I told her:
You do what works for you, but while you still have the kids, I’d like you to:
- put some music on in your headphones,
- make your bed,
- do a load of dishes,
- clear either the couch or the kitchen bench.
I don’t care if you put it away perfectly or if it just gets moved to the corner somewhere.
Just that. No more. Make yourself a cuppa (or a gin). That’s enough for today.
When she’s done she’s going to send me a message and maybe even send me a photo so we can celebrate – because it’s nice to share your pride and accomplishments.
She’ll feel good about making a start and these areas, in particular, being clear will lend themselves to faster progress as well as provide motivation and momentum for working on the next thing.
By giving her clear and achievable goals and ‘permission’ to stop at just those, she will not overwork herself or become frustrated that ‘that’s all’ she accomplished today.
Slow and steady wins the race. If you are starting from a point of complete overwhelm – I encourage you to start with a similar to-do list.
REMEMBER – short, clear, achievable to-dos and celebrate those small wins.
